WIN A FREE MEAL for 2 – Guess my time

Would you like to play a game?

In case you have missed it, nn the 22nd of July, I will race my very first Triathlon, where I will swim 400 metres, cycle 10k and then run 2.5k. For the event, I aim to raise £500 for Shelterbox, and I thought it would be fun to get you all playing a little game. This game will give you the chance to win a great prize rather than just ask for you to sponsor me with all proceeds going to Shelterbox.
So, how will it work?

All you have to do is try and guess how long it will take me to complete the Super Sprint race at the London Triathlon. Entries cost £3 a pop and you can make as many guesses as you like.

What to do?

1- Go to and donate £3.

2- Leave a message with your donation on the JustGiving page, guessing how long it will take me to complete my first ever Triathlon. The winner will be the one person to guess my time (give or take 2 minutes).

3- If more than 1 person guesses the correct time, all the names of people who guessed the correct time will be entered into a prize draw, only ONE voucher will be rewarded in total.

4- DO NOT add Gift Aid please (charities cannot claim Gift Aid for the sale of goods, raffles, prize draws etc.)

5- Tick the box that says ‘I’m happy to be contacted by Aida so I can contact the winner at the end of the game.

6- Share this event with everyone so your friends can enter the game and donate to the amazing Shelterbox.

7- My race starts at 4:40pm on Saturday the 22nd of July, 2017. Any entries made after that time will not be valid but will still be taken as donation.

8- If for whatever reason I do not take part or finish the race, a straight prize draw will be done with all the entries received.

9- I will be wearing a time chip during the race and that will be the official time to go by. A second timer will be used as a backup should the chip fail at all.

The prize

1- One gift voucher on the value of £150 to dine at any of the Hawksmoor Restaurants. Whilst I am happy to ship the voucher to anywhere in the UK/Europe, the prize can only be redeemed at one of the Hawksmoor restaurants in the UK – please see for all locations.

2- The voucher will be valid until June 2018, that expiry date cannot be extended and the card cannot be exchanged for cash.

3- The card isn’t named so the winner is free to gift it if he/she wishes to do so.

4- There is no cash alternative.


– If you would like to enter more than one guess then just make the payment to the equivalent amount (i.e. £6 for 2 guesses or £9 for 3 etc.) and leave all the guesses on the same message

– If you made your donation and forgot to leave your guess, please contact me via this event page and I will enter your guess manually.

– I will publish the winner’s name on Sunday the 23rd of July by 1pm and the card will be posted by Monday the 24th so make sure your contact details are correct on the JustGiving page.

Best of luck and get guessing!!!

going down

Today was a tough one, I found myself feeling low and weak and very inclined towards the binge eating mode.

After months feeling great and so full of energy, for the most of this past week I just felt that wherever I went, I was dragging myself. Being exhausted and under the weather – all that put together with an awfully grey day in London – my mood today just sank the deepest its been in a while.

It’s weird how your brain can so easily find the route back to its old ways. Even more weird is how long it can take you for you to recognize that path you are going down.

Everything feels ever so slightly familiar but you fool yourself to believing you are just fitting in.

I haven’t had such strong invasive food thoughts in a long time. For the first time in months, today, I had to stop myself from researching a diet, a healthy eating plan or supplement guide to help me through whatever is going on.

My brain, very quickly, went back into self-loading. In my head I felt fat and needed that fixed. In my head I was ashamed of being unfit.

All that while locked up in an office packed full of previously forbidden foods.

I really had to dig deep and, yes, there was some over eating but I am hitting reset to day one for a while and I will leave behind all of the negatives and focus on the ONE positive I AM STILL BINGE FREE.




Bad mummy?

We are going through challenging times with out little one. He will be 5 in just over a month and it seems this age is the new terrible twos.

There’s so much tension, so much stress that at times it’s hard not to question my skills as a parent…I also seem to question Daddy D’s skills a lot of the time which,  in term, will cause a whole other type of conflict.

Recently lill guy has started to show some signs of anxiety which I recognize only because I suffered with those myself, during my teenage years. Some might say that’s part of growing up, I of course understand that but as someone who spent most of life worrying about issues that were completely out of my control and developed great anxiety around a number of things, seeing my child potentially suffering with the same problem feels like a nightmare.

As a mental health patient and knowing how a lot of my life long issues come from unresolved childhood problems I am always too conscious about confrontation….that put together with all the advice out there (wanted or not), I have been going through days of constant self doubt and just generalized despair that I will end up raising an unhappy person full of negative self belief – jut like mummy.

Where do you draw the line? Is disciplining more important than just having a good laugh? Why are we doing so badly? How come all the other families seem to have their shit together? They work their jobs, ,they can afford their holidays, they seem to have date nights and still find in themselves to run around the park with their children.

I know we live in a world where people will mostly share the fun side of live and kinda hind the bad stuff and that can easily let you feeling like you are failing but, at the same time, I do catch myself feeling very grumpy on a family outing and rather content when out for a run by myself .

Is that what parenthood is? The eternal pursuit of imaginary and unrealistic goals?

One thing is for sure, I miss my gentle and cuddly little guy who – just months ago – would melt away in gratitude for anything I done for him and seemed really happy to just spend time with me. If its like that now, I wonder what teenage years have in store for us.

There you go, no wise word to end this post I’m afraid…just frustration and self doubt.

Tri-ing on a budget part 2


So when you are training for a Triathlon you will, of course, need the appropriate gear for swimming, cycling and running. I will sure talk About how to save money there but my first steps came from watching this Triathlon Tarren video –  10 Beginner Triathlete Equipment Essentials  (have fun!)

There are also a few other costs that will need to be considered, such as pool membership, open water swimming sessions (all depending on where you live of course) and just as important, the entry fee for the chosen event.

See, the entry for my chosen modality at the London Triathlon costs around £80. While I can sure see how well that money is invested (it looks like an amazing event with all security and support needed in a big place like London), I still have a budget to stick to and a pair of running shoes to buy. So I set off looking for a better option – to the expenditure, not the shoes.

My first plan was to finally go through the pile of stuff I have been planning to flog on ebay ( and never seem to find time to post).

A few weeks ago, however, I came across a London Triathlon Facebook poster about how you can sign up through a charity and save money on the entry fee. Of course I had to check it out!

Now, I have worked with many charities before, organizing events, helping out other fundraisers and even got people to sponsor me on the Royal London Marathon last year so I knew raising a bit of money for charity wouldn’t be a big deal.

I had a good look through all the different charities involved and my regular one wasn’t there, so I set off looking at different sites to see what the causes were and what were they asking in terms of pledge.

There were a few charities there that I would happily support and Shelterbox stood up to me because of the work they do at situations that will see most of us feeling useless.

So there you go, I have saved myself just over £70 – which will be well spent on a pair of running shoes for my plantar fascistic suffering feet – and will – at the same time – be paying forward by raising £500 to this amazing charity.

Entering fundraising mode in 3….2….1!!!





Tri-ing on a budget part 1

When I decided to sign up for my first triathlon i knew I’d be doing it all on a budget,  and a very tight one too.

At times like these, being the queen “googler” pays off. I am on constant research mode – for gear, techniques, training, “how to” tips, you name it.

If you are in the same boat I high recommend you check out @triathlontaren YouTube channel and his tips for beginners – there’s some gold there PLUS, being Canadian, he’s funny in a cute way…not to mention he’s ginge, I’m marry to one, that’s how much I like these fire hair folks.

Anyhow, I have recently bagged myself a great bargain and thought it was worth sharing – coz that’s carrying right?! The 220 Triathlon Magazine has a brilliant offer on at the moment. Not only you can get a subscription for 6 – 13 issues at a discounted price, they are also throwing in a Trisuit! Yap yap.

So this pretty lill fang is worth £59 and I’m getting mine for £23.99 and will also get 6 months worth of some fun triathlon themed reading material \o/ #win

Of course I do not know the quality of it but as beginner (and tight budgeted) anything that will hold through a whole race, allowing me to swim, cycle and run is goos enough.
I mean, that’s probably less than what I would to pay if I had to rent one out.

So there you go. How to get ready for your first triathlon on a (proper tight) budget. More tips soon to come!

Now I’m off to read my #220triathlonmagazine on the tube to show off my plans for this summer 😂😂

#londonstandstall and so should I…or me vs. anxiety the wash down.

NOTE: I actually wrote this on Wednesday 22nd of March 2017, in the evening after the attack at Westminster Bridge and The Parliament. 


London Olympic Park and off I went for a swim.

Its been a sad, weird and day stressful day for Londoners.

A large scale incident that might put in risk the life of those I love is one of my biggest fears.  Big enough to make stop daddy D and lill guy from coming to the Royal Parks Half Marathon last year, even though all I wanted was to see their faces and hug then at the finishing line.

That is a fear I had to work hard to overcome during cbt earlier this year and I can only say thank goodness my anxiety had been under control for a while now.

Seeing what happened today, so close to home, brought up so many emotions.

I was lucky to be at work, where I am too busy to browse one news channel after the other.

I managed to keep calm and don’t go into that dark place in my head where everything is a catastrophe but deep inside,  I could feel the anxiety trying to creep up on me. My heart rate was weird and my mind overpopulated.

It was an exhausting day and it felt like I used ALLLL my energy just to keep calm but I am happy and proud I made it through.

I had invasive food thoughts and didn’t binge, I had fast heart beat and my brain was in over drive but there was no panic attack.

Getting through a day like that and still be able to cope felt like a victory, something to show me the therapist was definitely right when she discharged me from treatment and wrote to me to say I was in full recovery.

To close the day a half ass 600m in the pool and off home for some sleep, much needed sleep.


Radical self love

So it seems as though I have turned a page some point over the past few weeks.

Between moments of pure joy for just being me and an open love letter to my body, I feel great.

As for  many people struggling – or who have struggled – with mental health issues, such high achievement can leave you worried about the come down.  

As a life long worryer I can’t help those thoughts popping up every now and then but I know they are just fear (and a little pragmatism), so just feelings.  Nothing concrete, nothing real and tangible.  

It is ok to feel things, fear is what keeps us alive.  What I am no longer willing to do is to live my life based on those feelings. 

I am not my feelings but how I react to them.

So I am now in a mission to keep the good vibe going and to learn to truly love my body again, bit by bit.

Today I caught myself watching my lips, it was just a little flirt but it reminded me of how darm sexy they can be.

So here it is, this week I will watch my lips and fall in love with then again.

Hello sexy! 



Dear body,

Sorry for all the awful things I have said and done to you in the past.

I was such a bitch and you DID NOT deserve that.

I’d like you to know that you are beautiful and strong. I love that you a healthy and capable of so much, I mean, you have made and given birth to the most precious boy on earth!

I promise I’ll be really good to you from now on, like you deserve.

You are fabulous and I LOVE YOU

Warm regards,


No selfie filter,  thank you 

Have you ever got upset over a selfie that doesn’t look quite like you were hoping for? It showed those dark circles around the eyes? Did you forget to put make up on and thought,  how did I even leave the house like that?

Every minute of the day we get bombarded with fake images that have been edited and manipulated to “improve the end result”.  So far that was a “luxury” reserved to magazine and tv models but what if I told you said tools are available to your finger tips?

For a while now I’ve had a nagging feeling about the “selfie filter” on my smart phone.  It’s almost as though retouching is now mandatory.  What is so offensive about people’s real image after all? Are people really so used to the fake stuff that they can no longer handle seeing my face in a photo if it hasn’t been modified?

BB cream and lippy on the left, filters 1, 2 and 3 to the right.

I know I’m no model but I’d like to think that even if I was repulsive – which I am fully aware it is not case – still I should be allowed to go about my day without feeling the pressure to “beautify myself ” before I can show my face in public.

There is a very fine line between putting your make up on to feel prettier and not being able to love yourself otherwise.

Am I the only one who finds absurd weird that in times when groups of consumers are waking up for the effect that retouched magazines has over teenagers (and fully grown women) all over the world,  such a filter is so accessible to everyone who owns a phone?

Now a teenager not only has to compete against that unrealistic body from tv but he/she also has to compete against their own retouched images.

Whats is it with the world that different industries seems to think we can no longer handle reality?

During the screening of Embrace – earlier this month – I watched the story of this amazing photographer who loaded her body until she took pictures of herself,  unique details and all.

In that spirit,  when shooting a few poses to show off my new hairdo, I too have decided to go real. My skin is blemish and I have dark circles under me  eyes as parents don’t sleep much. My face is round as I am a recovering eating disorder patient…


No make up as I haven’t got the patience or the skills for that and no filter as they don’t show those little details that make me who I am.